One day...

I feel like an empty shell

That 31st December

On 31st December 2014 at 23H50, I wanted to end the year on a positive note.I sat in my room and listened to Kaya's "Chant l'amour". Kaya's voice is very emotional in it and the lyrics always move me.

This song gives me hope that one day things will be better...

Becoming a better version of myself

My life is taking an unexpected twist with the fact that my partner is leaving me after 8 years of a beautiful relationship. I will not extrapolate on the subject and will not turn out to become a bitter person. That is not who I am. What do you do when you suddenly find yourself on the edge of void and emptiness?
I have surely made mistakes despite giving my best shot and although no one is truly to be blamed, all I can think about is to cling on to something positive. Maybe I am simply being given the opportunity of becoming a better version of myself. I am determined to be happy, with or without someone but at the same time I am weak these days. I will definitely cry on some lonely nights and hate myself for the mishaps that emerged along the way but I need to embrace the fact that life is a process and that I need to hurt to be able to heal. I am longing to have a good relationship with myself. Throughout those past years, I have been giving and loving but it has been to someone. Question is: Have I been giving and loving enough to myself?
I know the whole concept of the 'I' can be detrimental as it implies that the ego is put forward, in the limelight. That said, what is wrong in wanting to mend a broken heart? I do not want to be analytical or brainy, I just need to be inspired and intuitive. I am looking for signs everywhere to understand how to find a path which I can tread on. I do not want to see a sad version of myself. I do not want to be gloomy and aggressive. I need change, I need to breathe, I need freedom of thought, I need to dream again.I need to absorb each and every ray of light inside my body.

I need to glow in all simplicity and humility. We are all born to glow.

Sois Patient. Aie Confiance

A small voice inside my head me asks me to be patient and to have faith.
That's the least I can do for him.
Nothíng’s lost yet.

 

Mood of the month