To grow happiness this year will nevertheless require more focus and adaptability than usual. The world has become such a strange place for most of us. Worldly pleasures sure seem distant and uncertain now that we are learning to relate to objects and react to situations from a different perspective, realizing that our comfort zone was nothing more than a mere illusion. Values that we stand for, on the other hand, will not be a continual disappointment as they are the only lamp we have to guide us through the night. We, human beings are capable of so much insight, so why can't we just realize that transforming the self is the most fulfilling experience ever? Good and bad are always going to exist, the problem lies in the grasping of desire.
I met my friend Tatiana yesterday for a long overdue drink and catchup. Her utter disappointment of the treatment inflicted to her by our common friend William is rather heartbreaking. Perceiving the flaws of the people we love is in my opinion not enough, we also need to make sure they don't affect and impact our lives negatively. Sometimes distancing ourselves can help heal a relationship or at least bring it back to a healthier state.
Over the years, William's behavior has in turn been incoherent and superficial. It is as if he has been in a constant struggle about wanting to be one person but turning out to be the complete opposite. In trying to construct an identity of his own, he has picked up bits and pieces from other people's personalities which do not fit into his system, a cog which has made him go dysfunctional. His lack of discernment & judgement and inability to actually sit down and listen to what other people have to say has turned him into a person who is not always of pleasant company. And that toxic emulation of David has worsened things over the years. The more he tries to look, sound and behave like his boss, the more he ends up looking like a torn, used and corny version of that same person, something sadly laughable at the end of the day. When Tatiana tells me that she simply wants to put an end to that masquerade that has become this friendship, it honestly saddens me. Maybe the level of toxicity has reached unparalleled levels with nothing left to be done or maybe the ship can still be saved from a devastating wreck. Both possibilities exist. I want them both to be happy but not at the detriment of each other as it has been the case so far. Of course if this friendship is meant to come to an end, it will but I sincerely fear that the collateral damage will be one-sided. The old me would have intervened. The new me considers that it is up to people to find their own way of growing happiness, be it the hard way.
